Consistency

Posted on January 30, 2010 by MAL

The thing with consistently outlaying anything – be it this blog, a lady’s night, running, tweets, whatever – is that there will be times where it goes stronger than ever, and other times where it teeters on non-existent. I imagine marriage to be similar, but that’s another whole blog entry. Sometimes I will have ten to twenty comments on a blog post, and other times, none. But it all comes back to the fact that I love having an outlet for expression.

Same with the lady’s group I started back in July with the other girls.

Last night, we had “Ladies Who….Wii” night, and although the RSVP’s started strong – there were 12 people who were going to attend. By five o’clock yesterday afternoon, the numbers dwindled down to 3. Poor Jen who was hosting, she couldn’t help but feel it was indicative of how people felt towards her! Silly how we women think. It was just one of those days where people had other things come up in their lives…one’s moving this weekend and needed to finish moving boxes, another’s studying for a course, another one had a birthday party that was scheduled last minute, etc.

At first, I was disappointed because I had been working my ass off to get my novel finished by yesterday night. I worked until midnight every single evening this week, and stressed both Jock and myself out by running to the printer’s last minute yesterday. I found the cheapest guy in town, but with 225 pages and 7 copies – it still came to £47. I still have at least twenty pages left to write for the ending, but I figured I could email them those pages. At least the rest of the book was up to snuff to show off.

I handed out two copies, and the rest are still sitting in a box. But would I have worked as hard the last couple of weeks had I not had a due date? Probably not. Would I still be slowly peddling through the editing process, checking my email every five minutes? Yeah. Did this teach me how much I love getting lost in my work for hours at a time, and the biggest reward is when the time passes without you knowing? Definitely. Did I ever feel this way about acting? Nope. Do I regret giving up acting? Not right now. Will I go back to it? Yeah, probably. Performing is in me.

Nevertheless, the three of us who were there had a really amazing time chatting, playing Wii (Jen kicked my ass in bowling and tennis, but I literally punched her lights out in boxing. Yeh!). And my BMI is 22…I’m the least likely to get sick.

Having the time to consistently work towards a goal is the best gift that England and Jock have given me. And, if people don’t show up every once in a while, my knee decides to stop my running for a bit, or my readership dwindles on my blog, I’ll still make the best of it. I’ll still keep asking the universe for shit. And, as my wise sister says re: the universe and asking for stuff: “I ask for lots of things. We have an ongoing dialogue and it never ceases to make me laugh at the answers it gives. Trusting in that is the most rewarding and hardest life lesson.”

Heidi Montag’s New Face – the more mature take

Posted on January 22, 2010 by MAL

So, since my last post on Heidi’s new face, I’ve grown up a little. I have to admit that my initial reactionary stance was one of cruelty and loathing. It’s so easy to take the judgmental way out and look at something that someone’s doing as somehow attacking your own values. Instead, I ask the question, what do our reactions to Heidi’s new face say about us? Please click on the picture or text below to read the full article.

“Man is least himself when he talks in his own person. Give him a mask, and he will tell you the truth.” – Oscar Wilde

Heidi Montag completely changes her face through plastic surgery, and says that it makes her feel more confident, better about herself and more beautiful. She says that beauty and confidence is within and yet, she’s very grateful for being able to have had the surgery. She’s 23 years old – admittedly a bit young for such drastic measures – but old enough to make up her own mind. Out come the surgical knives, and in come the catty media to feed on her sawed off flesh. You would think she was on trial for kidnapping her natural face, and holding it for ransom. Why are we so against this adult woman changing the way she looks? What is it about morphing a face that angers us so?

Ironic Fashion

Posted on January 20, 2010 by MAL

I have a new article up for AND Magazine. These days of irony in fashion…Click anywhere to read the full fashion editorial!

“Why Can’t Anyone Tell I’m Wearing This Business Suit Ironically?” was the headline of an article back in 2005 from The Onion where a man becomes incensed by the fact that he went to all the trouble to don an expensive conservative gray three-button suit, cut his hair short and nondescript, become a lawyer, marry the ditzy girl from Connecticut and father two ironic children and no one got the joke. He ends the article by saying “Some days, it’s enough to make me want to embrace conformity like all the other sheep.” It’s what celebrities, models and the everyman have tried to embrace at some point in their lives to become the contradictory versions of themselves….“

Thanks, and I’m a Paid Writer!

Posted on January 2, 2010 by MAL

I wanted to say a special thank you to my family members who partook in the “Interview with Fam” series. It was especially great for me because I got to learn more about the ones who bear the same blood, and it was so nice to be able to share this weird world of blogging with you all.

For those I may have missed, I simply ran out of time leading up to Christmas, but will definitely do this again at some point!

On another note, I have two new articles up at AND Magazine. Please take a look and peruse the site. I’m really proud of the layout and how they’ve done it. Let me know what you think! Plus, I’m getting paid for writing for them now. I’m officially a professional writer then, right?

Keep It Simple Stupid

Posted on October 7, 2009 by MAL

Lately, I’ve had a lot of reminders of my second grade elementary school class (or primary school for the British) where they told me to always remember the KISS rule – “Keep It Simple Stupid.” A life lesson in such a perfect simplistic phrase and at the age of 8.

Somehow, I can relate everything in my life back to that age. Had my mother known the pressure she was under to give me one good year that I based my entire life on, she might have been more worried. As it turned out, those life lessons have stayed with me for the best or the worst of it.

I have two more weeks until my half marathon, and as I was running the simple seven miles (funny how now it doesn’t seem that far to run when just two months ago I would have guffawed, choked on my own saliva and legs turned to jelly), Jock and I began discussing future goals. I am afraid that after 26 weeks of training, once the half marathon is over, all my strength and new found toned legs will yes, turn back to jelly.

Well, Jock has another rule that he probably learned at a bit older of an age, and is a little more profound perhaps – he calls it, keep it SMART – Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Relevant and Tangible (or Time Based).

For fun, along the run, we applied our rules to everything in our life. And, these rules are so great that you can do just that.

For instance, at first I decided to run another half marathon in March in order to keep my new athleticism. He thought that was too soon for me. What I realized after more discussion that in fact, I really just wanted to reach my goal weight, and keep strong.

You see, I tend to be pretty single minded. So, when my goal to run a half marathon is my focus – that’s all I focus on. And, when we think back, yes, that was ultimately a goal, but all in the grand scheme of things to lose weight and keep in shape. However, in order to have enough energy to run this half marathon, I need to eat a lot of carbs. Carbs is something my body does not process well, but that my hips relish. So, even though I love my strength, I don’t love my hips and butt looking swollen.

After the half marathon, I will continue to have one long run a week, two short runs, but now I will also start including a day of yoga and weight training all with keeping a balanced diet so that by March of 2010, I will reach my goal weight.

At first, I was like, MARCH!! That’s so far away. That’s not keeping it simple stupid – that’s postponing the inevitable! Jock explained that I could probably make it to my goal weight by December, but then there’s Christmas and New Year, yadda yadda. God, sometimes I hate it when he’s right. Attainable and Tangible – yes, yes.

Another thing to apply the rules to – my book.

I have to admit that I put my goal to finish my first draft as the 2nd of October, and it now being the 7th of October…well, that’s past the date, now isn’t it?! And do I feel a little embarrassed by the fact that I didn’t achieve my goal? Yes, a bit.

For my rule, I wasn’t keeping it simple. I have been distracted by researching blog sights, how to get read, how to get published, what agents want in a book. Blah, blah, blah. Basically driving me to want to hit my head on the dining room table over and over, and stab myself in the chest all at the same time. Putting so much pressure on myself to get this book finished and published, that I lost some of the reason why I actually started writing it in the first place. Just to have a book written. So, keep it simple by remembering what I set out to do.

What if I don’t actually care if it gets published?

What if I just want to finish the damn thing and make it the best thing I’ve ever written? What if that is my only goal. Jock and I don’t need the money, I don’t need the recognition. Hell, finishing it would be an achievement in and of itself.

Once I finish it, will I want to get it published? Yes, probably. But, focus first. KISS.

And, SMART. I was being a little over eager about the due date. Am I the only person who knew the due date? Pretty much. That doesn’t help me though.

So, what’s an attainable goal? Christmas. I have 71,000 words and should be able to get the other 20,000 finished within the month, but why give myself that pressure? Christmas is a good present for myself. Specifically, I can break it down into how many pages per week, etc.

But watch out, because around that time I may be asking for a lot of you to read my book and give me the most honest feedback you could give someone.

So, each week, I plan to start the week remembering this mnemonic and acronym (big words!) and writing down my goals.

I love getting back to basics. Ahhh, simplicity. That makes me happy.

Oh, and the run was over before we knew it. Chatted the whole way, and voila! Seven miles done in the blink of a KISS.